13 Reasons Why has been the ultimate Netflix show as of right now. If some of you don’t know exactly what the hype is about, I am about to share my own perspective in what I took from this show. I was not sure what to expect but it's about a teenage girl who commits suicide and she creates these tapes in providing every reason or person who has affected her decision to taking away her own life. I feel this film had more of a deeper meaning than just being suicidal… it showed me a perspective as a mother, older sibling and mentor to students. It created this whole new being for myself in how as an example of a role model to the youth, how can I use the gift that God has given me to create change for them?
“Sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt me.” Someone may have shared this very quote but Words. Do. Hurt. No matter what, when repeated daily in a negative matter these words can mentally mess with your mind and will then begin to break you… sadden you… and truly hurt you. Doesn’t matter if it’s a one time comment, something in you will stir and you will get mad, repeat it even if it was heard just one time and some of you will just carry on. I remember, when I would be called certain names and negative words said to me that broke me down completely. Being the new girl in every town, I always tried to be “accepted” by others. It’s hard to find acceptance when you have to trust people to be your friends and when things don’t work; you lose that trust and have to start all over again. That creates this wall, like it didn’t work before how am I supposed to trust you now? It made me think back to how sometimes I didn’t treat others fairly and “judged” so quickly to rumors, because I was just trying to be accepted. I wouldn’t say I was this goodie two shoes because I know I did things that may have misinterpret others that I was something else.
“You have to find something you can hold onto.” Seriously, find that one thing and if you can’t find it, seek a mentor someone willing to help you along the way to encourage you. What kept me driven in life even through my pain of being a divorced child, my struggles of being the new girl, and how rumors broke me… I had my halau (tahitian and hula dance group), being involved in kickboxing, basketball and other activities. It was my other activities that I got to hold onto and being able to really find true friendships where I wasn’t judged. There may have been times when it felt like being in highschool with the cliques but my halau was like my second family. If there was a problem, we had to deal with it by the wrath of our Kumu. She took every relationship seriously and how we had to be supporters of one another no matter what. She is actually a big influence in showcasing that inner beauty through the art of dance and bonding with others was important. I got to hold onto dancing throughout my years in highschool and it definitely built a more confident self and help mold me to respect and understand the culture of love, and support.
“Be honest.” This show lacks honesty; that everyone had to lie to their friends or family and not be entirely true to themselves. The lies that fed their minds, created these characters of brokenness. It was the lies upon lies and not being upfront and honest with themselves to know that they were either gay, someone made them feel uncomfortable, and/or they were hurting inside. It was these mind games that play in this whole show and these games, just stems down to honesty… which majority of them time they weren’t always honest.
The show would not be a show if she didn’t do what she did. She went through some rough times in her life that every event lead to her own life in your own hands. It was the words and action of others, the betrayal, the misinterpretation, the focus on every bad thing that happen, that Hannah lacked hope. She focused her time on all the negative parts of her life, that she let it destroy her completely. If I have to relate it to faith, it was the enemy that allowed her to think that every bad moment was made only for her. If she was honest with herself and shared her darkest moment with her parents, found true support and if she didn’t interpret every bad moment in her life, she would still be alive. It was her fear, pain, struggle that she only depended on. “Even when all your resources are stripped and disappointment has settled in, you can hope in God-- who hasn’t left you or forgotten you. Don’t focus on the unrealized dreams in your rear view mirror. Dare to hope again.” (Flourish by Margaret Feinberg 174)
If we allow every bad moment to sink into our soul, we have nothing else to grab onto. This will break us, and we will not see why these challenges are here and why God placed them in our lives. We have to understand the the darkest moments can be our story to share among others. It is your voice, you life struggle and how you overcame it, that will be a change and hope to others.
We are created to provide change, be the hope in others that some may not even know. Step back and see who may be hurting, who needs your guidance, someone who is dealing with deeper issues, and connect with them. Provide them the positive influence they need, the hope they need. It’s as simple as setting up a time once a week or month to have a one to one dinner, a phone call, a letter in the mail and/or daily positive quote of encouragement. Be the hope in others, that God is to us.